I have been struggling to accept the compliments of so many when they have said I am an inspiration.  I felt that this was too high of a compliment for little me.  I am struggling with a scary and horrible thing.  I have chosen to fight it with a smile and a glass is half full outlook.  I decided today as I watched the end of the Oprah surprise farewell and realized I would use the word inspiration when describing this amazing woman to look up the meaning of an inspirational person.  I found this: 

"To be inspirational is to lead by example and encourage others to feel there is something worthwhile to become and do.

Characteristics of Inspirational People

• Self-Giving rather than selfish
  
• Humility rather than pride. This is not a false humility which makes people stay in the background. But, when they act, it is with a sense of oneness and not a superiority or inferiority.
  
• Courage. Courage to do the right thing, whatever society thinks
  
• Principles - Acting out of principles for good rather than material gain.
  
• Happiness - Inspirational people make the world a better place, and make people feel more positive.
• Vision - Inspirational People have a vision and help turn hope into reality."

OK!!  I get it now.  I have shown these qualities in my own way and I am proud to be this type of person for all who believe it.  I really want this horrible and terrifying journey to create something positive and if it is that I am showing everyone who follows me that it can be done then that will be worth everything!  Ultimately, I want to show that life is worth living in the best way!  God gives us this gift and He truly helps to show us the way as long as we listen and are trusting in Him.

I realize now that I am always a teacher.  I want there to be a lesson that comes out of everything!  One of the best compliments have come from a parent of one of my students.  She told my principal that I was so special because of all I have taught my students this year about life (as well as made math fun for them all!).  I cried when I heard this because teaching is such a huge part of me and this year it became even more special to me.  Each year I welcome a new set of students into my family and each year I enjoy teaching them and influencing them to love math.  BUT this year my parents and students have truly become a part of my family like no other year.  These parents were supportive beyond belief and the students were so caring and understanding beyond their young age of 7 to 8 year olds.  I have been gone now for a week from them and I have thought about them and missed them each day.  I look forward to celebrating with the students in the fall at a special lunch where I hope to show them all their caring and support paid off to help make me a stronger person. 

I have also been thinking about what is different about me in comparison to others with cancer and I realized it is a smile.  My nurses call me the party girl because I bring in a celebration atmosphere when I enter the chemo room.  I am their "smiliest" patient and make a day fun.  I challenge each of you to take a day and smile all the way through it.  Even if there is a problem or something unpleasant just smile through it and see how your day goes.  I am sure you will find others find a way to smile along with you.  It is a contagious thing!

Thank you for giving me the strength to be the inspiration you have known so far!  Thank you for supporting me through the toughest of times!