Stress and vanity

My enemies today are both stress and vanity!  I had a melt down this morning when these two things collided and Keith was left to pick up the pieces!

Vanity came in the way of my reaction to losing my eye lashes this morning.  I have seen them start to dwindle but this morning I found about 7 left on the top of each eye and 1 and 3 on the bottom of the eyes.  They were light colored to begin with and then to have them disappear I just feel like I look like an alien!  I cried so hard this morning!  It was one of the worst down times on this journey! I can rationalize that this is so minor in the scheme of things and that they will return in the future.

Stress has crept back in my life.  I am juggling the same number of things but this is the time in my job that gets stressful.  Deadlines are even more stressful because I have to consider my treatments and recovery time when trying to finish things.  Testing is a major part of my job this month and now I have to face it with few days I am available.  There is also more things going on for the girls and I am trying to not say that they cannot do things because mommy is sick or tired BUT I AM!!!   

I have been praying for peace and the strength to complete all that I feel I need to complete.  I am at a point on this journey that I am not willing to use cancer as an excuse for not getting my job done!  My brain still works and my passion for being an advocate for my students is still as strong as the day before I had cancer.  BUT I do want to be here for all the years to come so I know this stress is the worst thing I could do to myself!  I am finding that I am getting a great deal done in a day so if all goes as well as the last two days then I will get it all done. 

This too shall pass and I will look back on how small of a problem this really was but right now it feels like the largest mountain I have to conquer!